Showers and Spin Cycle

I have now had two lovely showers thrown for me.  One, here in Boston, was more for my family and friends and thrown by my bridesmaid pals; the other, in New Jersey, was more for celebrating with George's family and was thrown by his mom and sister (also a bridesmaid).  Both included games, some more awkward than others (hello, failing the "how well do you know the groom" quiz!) and generous presents and, my favorite, food.

The truth?  I am so truly deeply grateful for the people in my life who care about commemorating our marriage in this way.  Both showers involved me wearing odd things on my head, and at both, George also chose to wear these headpieces and for photos (and fun).  And both showers stressed me out beyond belief.

That's not quite right.  The showers did not stress me out; they were delightful and full of lovely people.  And, to my earlier point, both had kickin' food.  But I realized that I have a deep discomfort with people doing things for me for what feels like no reason.  It was awkward for me to sit and open lots of presents which I received because...I agreed to marry George.

Side note:  Don't get me wrong.  I think anyone who would agree to marry George deserves a lifetime of therapy and tons o' treats.  But that's in a whole different context.  (At least I've still got a sense of humor, right?)

One of our dearest family friends said to me a few weeks ago, "You just need to learn to sit back, take things, and say THANK YOU!"  It was good advice, and I've been working on it.  This whole experience taught me that while I feel I should earn and deserve everything I get, sometimes it's not really about me...it's about the person doing the giving.  That act of giving is what helps them to feel good, and they're doing it because they care about me.  So whether or not I feel I deserve the presents, or the parties...they're meaningful rituals.  Don't get me wrong; I don't think that anyone plans a shower feeling like Cinderella's mice the whole time.  I've been there; it's stressful!  But at the end of the day, what I learned for myself was how to say thank you and mean it, even if my first instinct is, "No, really, you shouldn't have!"

In other news, I am still not sleeping well.  Shocking!  George and I worked on a to do list review tonight and it just seems to grow every time...but we'll make it.  I have my appointment this weekend with Anahit, the extremely intimidating but extremely lauded seamstress, so there's that to look forward to.  Plus I can share an update on our baker and why we won't have a wedding cake (preview:  AVOID JUJU'S CAKE SHOP ON LONG ISLAND AT ALL COSTS!).  Then there's the mystery of the missing invitations...they came back return to sender, they vanished into thin air...they're all over the place.

Much news and much to be done...it's just a matter of making time to document it.

George and I have started waking up 30 minutes earlier each day, to give ourselves time to dent the to do list or just relax.  Hopefully we'll keep it up and slowly but surely finish everything in plenty of time!

kw